There is no single number of screen-time minutes that fits every child. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) says its updated guidance moves beyond simple screen-time limits and focuses on quality, context and conversation. That does not mean anything goes. It means good rules are specific to your family, and your child understands them. This guide shows how to set them.
Start with a family media plan
The AAP recommends a family media plan: a short set of rules that fits your routines and values, which you talk through with your kids. Its examples include:
- Screen-free zones, such as the dinner table, homework time and before bed.
- A one-screen-at-a-time rule, so devices that are not in use get turned off.
- Turning off autoplay and notifications, which the AAP says are designed to keep kids engaged longer.
- Choosing quality content over lots of ads or age-inappropriate material.
- Keeping room for other things, like reading, outdoor play, family games and hobbies.
The AAP also says every family member should have a plan, including the adults, because children copy what they see.
What rules are meant to protect
For children aged 6 to 12, the AAP says misuse of digital media has been linked with unhealthy sleep, poorer school performance, weaker attention control, less exercise and less time with friends and family. In its guidance for school-age children, the AAP suggests keeping limits that let kids finish schoolwork and other activities, and putting devices away at bedtime so children can settle down to sleep. Your rules do not have to cover everything. Start with the one or two things that matter most in your house.
Talk before you set the rules
The AAP suggests starting with a conversation rather than a list. Talk about how families need time for work, school, conversation, meals, exercise and rest, and that screens should not steal time from those things. Give older children the chance to share their views, and listen without judgment. The AAP also points out that kids resent limits that adults do not follow. When you slip, say so and reconnect: "Please forgive me for texting just now. Let me put my phone away so we can talk."
Rules that are easy to follow
The AAP's Center of Excellence on Social Media and Youth Mental Health notes that parents and children find three kinds of rule easiest to follow:
- Rules about the content a child is allowed to use.
- Rules the child helped design, so they are more likely to see them as fair.
- Rules that parents enforce supportively rather than punitively.
It also suggests making a shared plan, starting with changes that feel realistic, and checking in weekly. It advises keeping rules for children and adults reasonably similar, such as no devices at the dinner table, because kids get frustrated when parents seem hypocritical. It recommends predictable times for screens too. When children know when screens are allowed, they are less likely to beg or negotiate throughout the day.
Sample rules to adapt
- Screens are always open for 30 minutes before dinner on school days. The Child Mind Institute uses this kind of set time as an example.
- No devices at meals, and none in the hour before bed.
- Homework and chores come first, then screens.
- A written "activity menu" of things to do when bored, such as crafts, reading or playing with a pet. The Child Mind Institute suggests building it together with your child.
- Phones and tablets charge outside bedrooms overnight.
These are starting points, not a prescription. Change the times to fit your week.
When rules get tested
The Child Mind Institute says it is normal for kids to push back on new rules, with tantrums or repeated requests. It reports that children usually adjust within a week or two if you keep the rule consistent and avoid exceptions at first. It also advises against debating a rule once it is set, and against being drawn in by guilt trips such as "all my friends get more." It suggests starting a new rule when other things are changing anyway, like the end of a school vacation.
When a meltdown happens, the AAP suggests staying calm, skipping the lecture, and keeping your words few: "I know it's tough, but it's time to put your tablet away." Built-in device timers can help by giving a reminder before time is up.
Review and adjust
The AAP suggests revisiting your plan at the start of each school year and during summer and holiday breaks, since plans should change as your child grows. For older children, the Child Mind Institute suggests trying a compromise for a couple of weeks and tracking how it goes. For example, check whether they still wake up on time and finish their homework, then adjust.
Where tools and apps can help
The AAP lists parental control options that include blocking apps and websites, filtering content and setting time limits. No tool replaces the conversation. The AAP notes that controls, although not completely effective, can help filter content. If you want a tool built around chores and rewards, KefiFam lets parents set quests, approve them with a tap, and turn points into screen-time minutes, with apps locking when the time is up. You can find KefiFam on the App Store if you want to try it. Rules still work best when your child helped write them.
What to try this week: hold a ten-minute family meeting, agree two screen-free zones and one always-open time, write them down, and check in again in seven days.